1

Learning Curve to friendship <3

Amellia has been working really hard on building up her relationship with Dylan. She understands that he is a little different to others and that he doesn’t enjoy touching, close contact or really playing with her. Though I’m sure you can see how this is very difficult for a five year old to have to understand, and to follow through with. This is especially hard for her as she is basically the polar opposite of Dylan!

She wants to shower him with love and care. She wants to play with him 24/7, kiss and cuddle him and have in-depth conversations about what they are building with the Duplo blocks.. but she has slowly learnt that this isn’t going to get her very high up in Dylans popularity list. When he was building she used to go over and try and help and he would get frustrated at her and hit out, I always found this very hard to watch and explain to her over and over again. She wasn’t doing it out of badness, she just wanted to play and engage with her brother like she would other children. Whenever she then came anywhere near him he would hit out, try to bite her, scream etc at her.. and he still does now but not to anywhere near the same extent. They are both learning how each other work. She knows that if she goes and does something he can’t explain to her he is happy by himself so he will shout or do something else to show her, he has also learnt that not every time she walks past him or sits near that she is going to interrupt what he is doing.

I have seen huge progress between them recently, like all of a sudden they have clicked. They understand each other that little better and she understands why he is a little different and has accepted that she needs to treat him a little differently. Friday, was a huge moment for them. We came down in the morning when they had both awoken and Dylan was pottering about and Amellia was waking up and doing some drawing on her ipad.. when Dylan tottered over to her and sat up beside her all of his own accord. She then handed him her Ipad by choice and showed him what she was doing. She knows he really enjoys drawing so straight away he started to draw, he then took his little hand and placed it on hers. The squeal of delight out of Amellia was just magical. She didn’t want to move and declared this day to me as “The best day in her whole life” This is something that she has been waiting for, for a very long time!
img_4845They then sat like this for the next ten-fifteen minutes swapping whoevers hand was on top, while I melted with happiness for my little girl. This is the connection that she has been dying to get from her little brother since he was born and finally her dreams were coming true ❤
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I had seen that the friendship was growing rather steadily recently, like something had just clicked. She seemed to know when he didn’t want fussed over but was very quick to jump in when he was in a playful mood or was doing something she could do along side him! She did a lot of running about the house beside him before he would even acknowledge that she was there, but now he is looking for her when he starts running about, its magical.

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The other day they had lots of fun out on the trampoline together and Dylan got very upset when she got off, so she then got back on and bounced with him again! Then before she left she handed him a bit of chalk to draw with a zipped the trampoline up so he couldn’t get off by himself! This showed to me that she understood his cry was for her to come back, she then found something to distract him before she left and she also made sure her little brother was safe and couldn’t get hurt.

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This was on Thursday, she had gotten into the car beside him, and as you can see by her face, she is being careful not to touch him too much with her arm! He stayed a minute or two longer then was ready to depart and go back to the trampoline. His most favorite thing in the garden!

They are slowly working each other out, but today has been a big step in the right direction. I couldn’t be more proud of them both. When you have your sibling who understands you and supports you, it can really help you along.  ❤

WeeOhana xx

16

Why telling Siblings is important

This is something that I feel quite strongly about. It is because when I was younger it was never explained to me what was going on, why my brother was treated differently, why he had his outbursts or why he treated people the way he does. Obviously back then I was very upset, felt excluded and very confused but now when I look back on how I felt I feel extremely selfish. That I really missed out because of not having someone explain to me that was going on and why he was being treated differently etc. Between me and my brother there is only one year and 8 days so we were extremely close in age and we were very bonded. I love him dearly and always will, especially now that I understand his ADHD.

Therefor I have made very sure to keep Amellia involved and updated with what is happening with her little brother. She is extremely tuned in with him though, She spotted before us things he was doing or that he wasn’t doing that she thought he would be doing. One day she compared him to a friends child who has autism, and asked if he would always be like her. She also got incredibly worried whenever he wasn’t talking and started to ask us when he would start talking or be able to say her name or anything at all. This was when we decided it was time to tell her that things were slightly different with him and that we can’t  put a time on when he will start talking or if he ever will. We are pretty sure that he will talk because he makes lots of different noises and sounds etc, but it is hard for her seeing her friends with brothers and sisters around his age talking, running about, going swimming together etc.

Whenever we explained it to her we kept it nice and simple, that he would learn in his own time and that we would all have to make changes. We didn’t say too much too her as we don’t have an official diagnosis yet and we also didn’t want to say too much and confuse her. So we told her a few things and then let her ask whatever questions she had and told her that whenever she had any questions that she could just ask us. The next day she came up to us and made me so happy she told us “mummy I don’t mind if Dylan is different, I love him anyway.” I had to sneak off to have a cry, it was just wonderful  an incredible thing for a five year old to have said.

I think it is incredibly important to tell siblings, they will then understand why you have to make differences for them, why there has to be changes and why certain activities or things they enjoy just aren’t as easy to do anymore and why when telling them off it has to done differently and allowances have to be changed.

We are incredibly lucky parents to have such an understanding daughter. If we have to leave somewhere because he doesn’t like it she is perfectly ok with that (as much as I hurt for her) if she has to wait till another day to go to the park because he is having an off day she is ok with that, if he wakes her up in the middle of the night, shes ok with that too. she will come downstairs and lay with me until we get him sorted. She really doesn’t get enough credit for how wonderful she is. I always try and make sure she gets to do the things she wants to do even if it is in a few days time, and that she gets to spend 1:1 time with one of us as much as possible so that she can go to the park and can leave when she is ready, so that she can go swimming, so that she can be a child and forget everything that is going on at home that makes her life so different to a lot of her friends.

This is the reason why I will always keep her up to date with what is going on with Dylan, so that she can feel included along the way and so that she can have as big an understanding as she can about him.
Special needs does not just change the child’s life who is living with the special need it changes everyone’s in the family.

We are all still getting used to the changes, his quirks, dislikes and likes, but we are doing it together as a family. Learning as we all go. I don’t think there has been a more relevant time to reinstate what my blog name stands for; Ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

WeeOhana xxx

2

Puffy Paint!

Today was a hide inside from the world kind of day. Have some fun with my little ones and to forget everything else that was going on!
We decided that we would start the day with some sensory fun of painting with puffy paint!

Puffy paint is very simple to make, and we had all the things that we needed to make in our house! You make it with Three simple ingredients; shaving foam, pva glue & paint.
img_0607You mix together a shaving foam with the same amount of pva glue, though don’t mix it too much or too fast as it will just turn into a runny mess! Then add your paint and mix slowly again and keep adding the paint until you get it to the colour that you want!
Then thats it done, let the fun begin!

My little princess was straight into it and was having so much fun! So much so that I had to stop her from covering her whole body!
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My little man wasn’t quite so keen.. it started off fine for the first few minutes.. until he then realized that it was all over his hands and he wasn’t to keen on that! I quickly cleaned his hands then hunted out a paintbrush to try and win him back over to the idea of it!
He started to enjoy it again a bit more again then knowing that he didn’t have to touch it, and with mum stood on the side to clean his hands if he wanted it off!

He then got brave enough to paint his own hands! Though that didn’t last too long, but at least he tried it! =]

After everyone getting cleaned we enjoyed a little dance to some songs on YouTube. His little bum wriggle gets me every time, check it out!

After our dancing and painting it was then time for his nap and me and my little girl made cupcakes!
Then we all enjoyed a little cuddle when he woke up and needed a little cwtch back to sleep!

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My precious pair and I enjoyed a quiet day at home letting the news sink.

WeeOhana xx

2

Delamont Park

Today we had a lovely family day out, and you are from Northern Ireland or are over here visiting I really suggest visiting Delamont Park! It’s just a thirty minute drive from Belfast center and a five minute drive from Downpatrick It’s also a very affordable day out, we have found that many places you will go and visit cost rather a lot of money for a family of four to get in, but to get into Delamont Park was a tiny amount of £4. Which is amazing considering all that is there!

There are several different walks and are all sign posted and you also get a map whenever you go into the park which shows you where the routes go, how long they are and what you can find along the way! We opted for one of the shorter walks because we had the children with us, and we didn’t fancy having to carry little miss around the walk when her legs got tired! We went for the 4km walk, there are ones which are also shorter than this and also longer so there is a walk for everyone to do! The only thing I would say is that on the map you are given it doesn’t give you any sort of idea of the terrain, the path was excellent and very easy to push a pram along, though is very stony. I think having our baby jogger GT made it easier to push with the big wheels I’m not sure how easy a pram with slandered wheels would have been to push! My little girl found it a little difficult as a lot was uphill which we hadn’t really thought about, but she kept going with a bit of encouragement! She particularly loved seeing the sheep along the way and stopped at every one to try and entice them over with some grass..this didn’t go in her favor! Along the walk were some incredible views, and things to stop at. Several little stone beaches, a bird watching area, and many more but we were enjoying the walk so much we didn’t stop at these things, though I will make a point of ensuring we do this when we go back!

When we first arrived we started with our picnic, there was so many benches and open bits of grass to sit on so lots of space for whenever it is busy to enjoy you picnic without many around you! My little one was eager to sit on the grass and have hers, so this is what we did and had some lovely little sandwiches before we headed off on our adventure! #

After our walk we went on this wonderful little train which is designed to look like Thomas, it runs along a 1KM track and was really enjoyable! The little ones loved being on a train and really enjoyed it and I took in some of the wonderful views around while really cherishing the time we were spending together!

Next stop was the play park, what little ones don’t love parks right! Well this is one that is truly going to be enjoyed by any park lover. It is just wonderful, lots of wonderful wood climbing frames, slides, puzzles and much more. I really liked that they had a climbing frame for all ages! There was a big and a little one like you would find in more parks, but also a medium sized one too, which my little girl really enjoyed. She likes the big ones but wants you to go up them with her and with it being a bit busy, I wasn’t for climbing up with her and getting in the way of everyone! She went off and enjoyed the big one for a short while but wanted to play with her brother so spent a lot of the time on the little one with him, which was great as there was no one else on it! There was also a zip wire which she really enjoyed. As well as there being some great climbing frames/ balancing things/slides etc there was also a lot of open space to run about. My little boy really liked this as he likes to just potter about and explore the world around him rather than climbing on climbing frames and going on swings etc!

 

Beside the park there was also one of those metal gyms that are becoming increasingly popular, and there are also some of the single gym items placed along the walks too! Just in-case you were wanting to go there to jog/workout ..

We ended our day by then going out for dinner and coming home and having a lovely bath! Both the kids are now fast asleep in bed, and we are just about to settle down to watch a move! All in all we had a fantastic day and will be back to Delamont Park very soon; in fact we enjoyed it so much we are going to get the season pass so we will be visiting it many more times! I will let you know if we find anything else about in Delamont Park that we think is a must see while there.. but for now, you should really go there, enjoy the peace, views, beauty and nature. Oh & the park and the train if you have little ones with you!

Let me know if you go for a visit and what you think! =]

WeeOhana xx

 

4

Simple Must Try Fun!

With my little girl just starting preschool we have been trying to find ways to keep her busy but aren’t that strenuous as she is coming out of preschool exhausted and grumpy! She is really enjoying herself which is such a great thing and I’m starting to get used to the afternoon classes rather than the usual ones! This week is her first week of being in everyday! The hubby came home from work and was greeted by an exhausted me (my little man has lost his great sleeping ='[) and a hyper, yet grumpy girl as she was knackered! Until he announced that he had a fantastic idea! I sighed.. expecting it to be something utterly ridiculous, loud and messy… to my surprise it was not!
He looked at me and said “i just need some string and a hanger?” I was a bit suspicious.. what could you do with a bit of string and a hanger? This did not sound like fun.. it sounded like a big old let down! My oh my was I wrong!
I watched as he tied a bit of string from our door handle to the fire place, then ran upstairs and appeared with a hanger and my little girls favorite teddy/puppet who has fittingly been called “Monkey” .. I’m sure you can guess, he is monkey! She was bouncing about the place asking me what it was for and she was getting very excited… and I just was just very confused by it .. he then announced it was a Zip-line! I still couldn’t see how.. until he showed us!

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As you can see by the look on her face.. this was one of the best things she had ever seen! She thought this was so fantastic! Such a simple idea and she had hours of fun! Everyday since she has had the zip-line!

So all you need is a length of string and two places to hang it.. the higher the better and a kids trouser hanger!
Little miss got a bit concerned that it would hurt her lovely toys, so we got them to “hold” on with there hands!
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This is how monkey and how he held on! =]

Such a simple thing, yet entertained my little ones for ages and the dog! She thought it was great trying to catch a moving target.. Little miss didn’t appreciate this too much though so Lilo got a pigs ear and was happy as Larry to let the Zip lining continue! =] Little Miss loved it so much she even had to facetime nanny so that she could see the fun monkey was having!

Do you guys have any simple things that your little ones love?
If you try this let me know what your little ones think! =D

WeeOhana x

6

Right or Wrong?

This was something that someone said to me a while ago, but I was talking about it with a friend recently and I thought I would write a little blog and see what you guys thought about it!

What does Marriage mean to you?
The Oxford dictionary gives it the definition as “The legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman (or, in some jurisdictions, two people of the same sex) as partners in a relationship:

To me, marriage is something that you do whenever you really love someone. It’s a way of showing someone that you love them so much that you can’t imagine or want to think of life without them. You love them unconditionally and want to be with them for the rest of your life.
What would you say marriage means to you?

The reason I ask is that my little girl has told us since her brother was a week old, that they will get married, and she can’t wait to wear a pretty dress. She likes to play weddings and pretend to get married to him, they then have to have a fancy dinner and dance. She was at my wedding you see, that is why she is clued in! 😛

I personally, find it absolutely beautiful. To me it shows how great her love is for him and how much she cares and cherishes him! I never tell her not to say it, I never tell her that she can’t or that it is wrong. She is three, does she really need to know that she can’t, she will learn that as she grows. Should I really tell her that it is wrong? Taint the way that she views it all? Because to me.. Marriage really is about love, and if she thinks this and this is her way of telling us just how much she loves her brother, why should I tell her off? Surely it will just confuse her little innocent mind?

One of my husbands friends partner was over our house whenever my little girl announced to her that she was going to marry her brother. This woman then started to say in a loud and horrible voice “You can’t do that, that is disgusting thing to say” “That is incest” “ewww” and the such… she then started to say to me “how can you let her say that?” i politely replied with “Personally I think its pretty cute actually, she really loves him.” When they then left I said to my husband about it and how I thought that her even saying that to my daughter was completely wrong, that if she didn’t agree with that she should have just ignored it and let us handle with it, if we thought it needed dealt with.

Thankfully my daughter just ignored her and asked me what did she say and I just said that she was talking to mummy.

I remember when I was younger I wanted to get a big house and live with my brother and sister forever on a farm. I wanted to marry my brother at some stage too! Not a clue why mind you… hes a bit .. different! 😛

Though I was just wondering what was your view on this? Am I in the wrong, is it completely disgusting? Or is it just a lovely way of her expressing her feelings and how much she loves him?

WeeOhana x

3

Toucan Box craft

Bit of a different blog for you guys today. Though I had to blog about this box as it was just downright fantastic.

As I was pondering on what to do with my three year old when she got home and the hubby had gone out to wet the babies head, I got a wonderful delievery from the postman. I had seen an advert on my facebook for a little box called a Toucan box; Basically it is a little box which has all the materials and instrutions in it to make a craft item. You can choose from a couple of options on there website of how often you want them, how many craft ideas and extra supplies for more children, I think the extra supplies thing is fab idea and I will be doing this whenever my little man is old enough to join in! When you have signed up for a box you then get to select what things your child enjoys so it gives the boxes a lovely little personal touch as you know they will enjoy all the crafts you receive.

So whenever she got home and the hubby had gone to enjoy himself, I told my litle girl that the post man had brought her a special parcel. She found this exceptionally exciting, seeing as she very rarely recieves post! Though I know that I find it exciting still as an adult to get unexpected parcels in the post,I was also pretty excited to see what these little boxes contained.

I was very excited whenever we opened it and found this;

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All the wonderful things we would need to have a jellyfish race in our own house! Not only is it super cool to have a jellyfish race in your own house but my little girl adores the seaside! Her nanny and bampy live right by the seaside so she very much adores the seaside and anything to do with it! I was super impressed with how all of the craft bits incuded in this box were of very high standered. The ribbion is super thick and really impressed me! All the colours on the peices included in the box are very vibarent which obviously to my three year old and other little ones makes it even more appealing! I was pleasently surprised to find that the bits that were the body of the jelly fish, were of a sturdy cardboard and were already pre cut. They also already had holes along the bottom of them to make the jellyfish legs! I thought that I would have to create these holes myself and cut out his body, so it was super that it was all ready and all I had to do was simply trim the ribbion and the straw. With an impatint and excitable toddler, this was a mega bonus. So i quickly trimmed all of these things down so that we could get started on creting these racing jellyfish.

So, we got started.
I showed her the instructions and they were so beautifuy dispayed that she could even understand them! Every stage was illistrated so well that you hardly need to even read the instuctions that are written below the pictures.

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As you can see; this craft really held her attention! I think it is because she could follow the instructions and all of the bits were ready waiting for her to just put them where she was meant to! She needed help with a few parts of this craft but with only being three I expected this and got the Toucan box so that it would give me ideas of what to do with her and hopefully help me think of new crafts to do with her.

Inside the box also comes a litle postcard idea with activities on the back for you to do with your children while you wait for your next box! :] On the front of the instructions it also gives you a messiness rating, a grown up assistnce level and also little facts about what you have just made. So for example with the box I got which included the kit to make the jellyfish came facts about the jellyfish to share with my three year old! Another great addition to the box is a “What we are learning” card. So for exaple this one is Science, Art & Design. It also gives you ideas of what to talk about to your child while doing the activity to help increase the knowledge they gain.

Here is our finshed product; I didnt want to give to much away as I really advise you try out one of these boxes!

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They deliver to all of the UK at 98p for a petite box, which is what I got for my first box and £2.95 for a standard box. If you live outside of the UK they have an email address on the there website to contact the and to see how much it is. here is a link that will enable you to get your first box for free to try it out and if you really don’t like it well then its very simple to cancel.
Trust me though, you should give it a go and I hope you are as pleasantly surprised a how fab it is as I was!

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Oh and another thing to add about these super cool boxes is that they come with little stickers/tokens and whenever you have enough you can then choose a prize. You can see which prizes they have on there website for you to choose from!

WeeOhana xx