16

Why telling Siblings is important

This is something that I feel quite strongly about. It is because when I was younger it was never explained to me what was going on, why my brother was treated differently, why he had his outbursts or why he treated people the way he does. Obviously back then I was very upset, felt excluded and very confused but now when I look back on how I felt I feel extremely selfish. That I really missed out because of not having someone explain to me that was going on and why he was being treated differently etc. Between me and my brother there is only one year and 8 days so we were extremely close in age and we were very bonded. I love him dearly and always will, especially now that I understand his ADHD.

Therefor I have made very sure to keep Amellia involved and updated with what is happening with her little brother. She is extremely tuned in with him though, She spotted before us things he was doing or that he wasn’t doing that she thought he would be doing. One day she compared him to a friends child who has autism, and asked if he would always be like her. She also got incredibly worried whenever he wasn’t talking and started to ask us when he would start talking or be able to say her name or anything at all. This was when we decided it was time to tell her that things were slightly different with him and that we can’t  put a time on when he will start talking or if he ever will. We are pretty sure that he will talk because he makes lots of different noises and sounds etc, but it is hard for her seeing her friends with brothers and sisters around his age talking, running about, going swimming together etc.

Whenever we explained it to her we kept it nice and simple, that he would learn in his own time and that we would all have to make changes. We didn’t say too much too her as we don’t have an official diagnosis yet and we also didn’t want to say too much and confuse her. So we told her a few things and then let her ask whatever questions she had and told her that whenever she had any questions that she could just ask us. The next day she came up to us and made me so happy she told us “mummy I don’t mind if Dylan is different, I love him anyway.” I had to sneak off to have a cry, it was just wonderful  an incredible thing for a five year old to have said.

I think it is incredibly important to tell siblings, they will then understand why you have to make differences for them, why there has to be changes and why certain activities or things they enjoy just aren’t as easy to do anymore and why when telling them off it has to done differently and allowances have to be changed.

We are incredibly lucky parents to have such an understanding daughter. If we have to leave somewhere because he doesn’t like it she is perfectly ok with that (as much as I hurt for her) if she has to wait till another day to go to the park because he is having an off day she is ok with that, if he wakes her up in the middle of the night, shes ok with that too. she will come downstairs and lay with me until we get him sorted. She really doesn’t get enough credit for how wonderful she is. I always try and make sure she gets to do the things she wants to do even if it is in a few days time, and that she gets to spend 1:1 time with one of us as much as possible so that she can go to the park and can leave when she is ready, so that she can go swimming, so that she can be a child and forget everything that is going on at home that makes her life so different to a lot of her friends.

This is the reason why I will always keep her up to date with what is going on with Dylan, so that she can feel included along the way and so that she can have as big an understanding as she can about him.
Special needs does not just change the child’s life who is living with the special need it changes everyone’s in the family.

We are all still getting used to the changes, his quirks, dislikes and likes, but we are doing it together as a family. Learning as we all go. I don’t think there has been a more relevant time to reinstate what my blog name stands for; Ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

WeeOhana xxx

8

Shredded Paper!

Who knew something so simple could bring such joy!
I got a parcel in the post.. which obviously bought me joy, but then after taking out of it what I had ordered I had a great idea.. kind of!
We have been told to try and get our little man to do a lot of messy play/feeling different things.. anything sensory related to try and encourage him to eat better, which personally I thought was an odd suggestion until they told me that your hands and the feelings you accept on your hands is very similar to the way it feels when in your mouth! So we are hoping that if we encourage him to feel as much possible it will help with his eating! It isn’t as simple as it sounds.. as he refuses to touch anything that looks different generally! So when I opened my parcel I took out my things and noticed that the shredded paper felt a bit different, so I thought lets just see what the wee man makes of it!
He loved it! He was throwing it everywhere and by the end of it he was letting me put it on his legs without a fuss and passing it to me for me to do it again for him!
He was laughing, coming to me to engage in play, feeling something different, and trying to make eye contact! It was just fabulous. . and very simple to brush up after!
I really encourage you to use anything and everything for them to play with! Something that you think won’t be fun, or is just going to go in the bin, let your little one have a look at it! (if its safe for them obviously!) You never know what they will enjoy and learn from!

This shredded paper ended up in a fantastic learning experience for him with lots of fun too!img_2175WeeOhana xx

0

Growing up!

I can’t quite believe that in only four days my little princess will be turning Four! It seems like only yesterdy she was a tiny little baby that needed every single thing done for her! She was a lovely litle 7.5lbs when she was born, and just stayed so tiny! She is still only 28lbs.. which is pretty tiny for four year olds! Considering that her ten month old baby brother is 21lbs! Soon he will be bigger than her!

She is such a kind hearted little soul! She adores her little brother and is constantly hugging & kissing him (not that he is a big fan of it!) and giving him toys! Obviously she has bad days and just doesn;t want him to touch any of her things.. but honestly, I don’t blame her! He isn’t the most light handed of children! Though she is also a very energetic little one and constantly wants to be on the move and bein filled full with new information! Lots of people find this hard to understand and think that she is being bold etc whenever she can’t sit still, is running circles, asking 1001 questions whnever you are trying to talk to someone. I love how inqusiive she is, how willing to learn, how egar to please she is but I can understand why people find it hard to understand sometimes, heck sometimes I wish she wuld just sit still for 10 minuites and not ask me questions about every little thing that happens! One day I said to her “Why do you ask so many questions!?!” and she replied with “Because I am inquisitive mummy”… first thing is first, where did she learn/hear that word? I don’t think I have ever used it in my life! Yet my three year old daughter can pluck this word from god knows where, put it in a scentence and use it properly! Help!?! In a few years time if she keeps up like this I will need a translator to explain to me what all these words mean!   

I am still in denial that she is going to be four… and in a very girly way, she is having a man come to her party with snakes,lizards,tarantulas, owls etc! True her style ;] She just loves going out in the garden and hunting out bugs! Reminding her to keep them ouside sometimes is a bit of a task! 

Now to think of some fun party games for them to do after they have played with all these animals! I’ll let you know how it goes! Do you find they grow up far to quick? 

WeeOhana x

4

Simple Must Try Fun!

With my little girl just starting preschool we have been trying to find ways to keep her busy but aren’t that strenuous as she is coming out of preschool exhausted and grumpy! She is really enjoying herself which is such a great thing and I’m starting to get used to the afternoon classes rather than the usual ones! This week is her first week of being in everyday! The hubby came home from work and was greeted by an exhausted me (my little man has lost his great sleeping ='[) and a hyper, yet grumpy girl as she was knackered! Until he announced that he had a fantastic idea! I sighed.. expecting it to be something utterly ridiculous, loud and messy… to my surprise it was not!
He looked at me and said “i just need some string and a hanger?” I was a bit suspicious.. what could you do with a bit of string and a hanger? This did not sound like fun.. it sounded like a big old let down! My oh my was I wrong!
I watched as he tied a bit of string from our door handle to the fire place, then ran upstairs and appeared with a hanger and my little girls favorite teddy/puppet who has fittingly been called “Monkey” .. I’m sure you can guess, he is monkey! She was bouncing about the place asking me what it was for and she was getting very excited… and I just was just very confused by it .. he then announced it was a Zip-line! I still couldn’t see how.. until he showed us!

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As you can see by the look on her face.. this was one of the best things she had ever seen! She thought this was so fantastic! Such a simple idea and she had hours of fun! Everyday since she has had the zip-line!

So all you need is a length of string and two places to hang it.. the higher the better and a kids trouser hanger!
Little miss got a bit concerned that it would hurt her lovely toys, so we got them to “hold” on with there hands!
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This is how monkey and how he held on! =]

Such a simple thing, yet entertained my little ones for ages and the dog! She thought it was great trying to catch a moving target.. Little miss didn’t appreciate this too much though so Lilo got a pigs ear and was happy as Larry to let the Zip lining continue! =] Little Miss loved it so much she even had to facetime nanny so that she could see the fun monkey was having!

Do you guys have any simple things that your little ones love?
If you try this let me know what your little ones think! =D

WeeOhana x

4

Nursery, Toddler & Puppy!

Hello you lovely people who visit my blog! =]

Woohhoo I have been blogging for one year today, I started this last year!
Thank you for everyone who has followed me so far and I hope you enjoy it! =D

This past month has been crazy, my little girl has started nursery, my little boy is trying really hard to walk, I have started a new venture, puppy training and all the other things that come along with life! I’ll fill you in on the exciting bits! =]

Nursery.. it’s a bit strange at the moment as they are starting them very slowly! So much so that she has told me that it is boring as they don’t have enough time to do anything and they just do story time. I do think that half an hour is not long enough at all for them to settle. I think it would be better if they were in everyday and build the hours up. She is in random days at the moment and doesn’t have a clue if she is coming or going! Thankfully they do start a bit more normal soon, so I’m sure she will love it then! She just can’t get her head around when is going! I am excited for it to start normally, though I do wish she had got a morning place as it would make it a lot easier to get up and go out. It would also mean that you could actually do something else with the day!

My little man is very eager to walk, so eager actually that he will let go of the sofa at the edge move his foot then fall flat on his face! He just needs to get the balance down! I can’t believe that he is nine months old now! It seems to have gone a lot quicker with him than it did with my little girl, though I am going to thoroughly enjoy spending 1-1 time with my little man! Not sure he is going to enjoy it quite as much as I do though.. he spends his days following his big sister, watching everything she does and stealing her food!

Puppy training is going well! She very rarely has accidents during the day now, and when she does it generally is my own fault as I haven’t picked up on her little hints! She loves going for walks and is perfect on the lead and walks happily by your side.. untill she sees another dog or human! But thats just normal, she also is learning the basics very quickly! I am taking her to a puppy class which is one day a week for an hour for five weeks. It is really good! It is more just for the tips and to be reminded of what is sort of the obvious really! It’s great though as she gets socialized with the rest of the dogs that go and she gets to see lots of new people!
Pictures of her first visit to the beach to make you smile! 😀
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Have you ever took a puppy to puppy classes? Did you find them helpful!
How are your little ones settling into school now?
Anything exciting to share?

I’m going to do another post now about my new venture! Eeek.. it’s exciting! =D

6

Right or Wrong?

This was something that someone said to me a while ago, but I was talking about it with a friend recently and I thought I would write a little blog and see what you guys thought about it!

What does Marriage mean to you?
The Oxford dictionary gives it the definition as “The legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman (or, in some jurisdictions, two people of the same sex) as partners in a relationship:

To me, marriage is something that you do whenever you really love someone. It’s a way of showing someone that you love them so much that you can’t imagine or want to think of life without them. You love them unconditionally and want to be with them for the rest of your life.
What would you say marriage means to you?

The reason I ask is that my little girl has told us since her brother was a week old, that they will get married, and she can’t wait to wear a pretty dress. She likes to play weddings and pretend to get married to him, they then have to have a fancy dinner and dance. She was at my wedding you see, that is why she is clued in! 😛

I personally, find it absolutely beautiful. To me it shows how great her love is for him and how much she cares and cherishes him! I never tell her not to say it, I never tell her that she can’t or that it is wrong. She is three, does she really need to know that she can’t, she will learn that as she grows. Should I really tell her that it is wrong? Taint the way that she views it all? Because to me.. Marriage really is about love, and if she thinks this and this is her way of telling us just how much she loves her brother, why should I tell her off? Surely it will just confuse her little innocent mind?

One of my husbands friends partner was over our house whenever my little girl announced to her that she was going to marry her brother. This woman then started to say in a loud and horrible voice “You can’t do that, that is disgusting thing to say” “That is incest” “ewww” and the such… she then started to say to me “how can you let her say that?” i politely replied with “Personally I think its pretty cute actually, she really loves him.” When they then left I said to my husband about it and how I thought that her even saying that to my daughter was completely wrong, that if she didn’t agree with that she should have just ignored it and let us handle with it, if we thought it needed dealt with.

Thankfully my daughter just ignored her and asked me what did she say and I just said that she was talking to mummy.

I remember when I was younger I wanted to get a big house and live with my brother and sister forever on a farm. I wanted to marry my brother at some stage too! Not a clue why mind you… hes a bit .. different! 😛

Though I was just wondering what was your view on this? Am I in the wrong, is it completely disgusting? Or is it just a lovely way of her expressing her feelings and how much she loves him?

WeeOhana x

2

Valentine’s Day, NI silver

Me and the hubby generally aren’t ones to do Valentines day, but whenever my sister (http://daydreamingfoodie.com) sent me a link to the most beautiful necklace I had to have it!
It was of Scrabo tower, which is a landmark in Newtownards which is a town in Northern Ireland. Scrabo tower means a lot to me and my hubby as it is where we first got together again and went for a walk and fell in love (at least on my side :P) It is also where he purposed to me and now we go on walks there with the little ones too! So as you can tell from all that has happened there it does mean a great deal to us and holds a special place in our hearts. Once I had seen the necklace, I knew that I must acquire it and wear it everywhere because of the great deal that Scrabo means to us! It was also made more beautiful to me because it was handmade here in Northern Ireland too. I love handmade things and buying from local people!

Whenever my hubby met the lady he said that she was also super lovely, she let my little one choose earrings for me too and then her child and mine played for a while! it makes something even more special whenever it is made by an equally lovely person, I contacted her on twitter to tell her how much I loved the necklace and was trying to bribe the hubby to get me them! Upon having a little chat with her I discovered just how lovely she was! I was chatting with her about how my little girl really wants one now too and that I would prefer if possible if the earrings could be made into a stud style … and she replied with how she loved new challenges and would work on doing a copper little Scrabo for her and on seeing how the earrings worked as studs.. what a lovely lady! Not only was she just lovely, she was excited about trying new challenges just for me… it made me feel a little special! 😛 So now I am eagerly awaiting to see how these little challenges she has set especially for me turn out!
I really advise a little visit to her page on etsy
She has some gorgeous little things! A little sheep who is also very adorable ;] I know she would also appreciate a little follow on twitter (@NISilver_COM)

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How beautiful and perfect is that! So much detail for a thing so small and handmade!

Back to our valentines day.. We Just chilled out in the house with the littlers & then I made us steak for dinner and ended the day with cuddles watching Lee Evans… he is a simply fantastic comedian! One of my fave!
Anyway.. I must go.. currently doing my Project life, I’ll let you guys see it soon! ;]
Remember now, have a little visit too https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/NISilver?ref=l2-shopheader-name .. Let me know you favourite thing on her website in the comments & also what you guys got spoilt with by your valentine & what you did ;]